March, 2009

Who knew? After three weeks of getting slammed by the women’s team, the guys finally broke the curse. Or rather, Brian McKnight finally broke the curse.

After chillin’ in the background for the past three weeks (hardly audible) McKnight stepped up to the plate and pretty much single-handedly sunk the nearly-unsinkable Athena women. In what could only be termed as disarray, the women’s team was all over the place under Claudia Jordan’s leadership. Too bad. I like Claudia, but she was out of her element here – especially when pitted against the Rivers (Joan and Melissa), two strong personalities. (Note: I still can’t understand why both are on the show, and it seems an unfair advantage to have both on the same team – but that’s my own personal peeve.)

Anyway, McKnight took the helm of the men’s team (finally, a worthy leader). His first wise decision was not to use Dennis Rodman. He was right. It takes far more energy to keep tabs on and try to control Rodman than simply ignore him. Second-best decision made by McKnight: do what it is you do best. And he did – to the Nth degree!

This week’s challenge was to present ACN’s video phone at an ACN convention. The convention’s attendees would decide the winning team. While the women put on a commercial of sorts, introduced by Joan Rivers, something got lost in translation.

Team Athena forgot the first rule of entertainment: it’s simple – entertain. They tried. But the (supposedly impromptu) proposal, before the crowd of hundreds, just fell flat. While attempting to appeal to the crowd’s emotions, Athena neglected to understand that folks stuck at a convention … just…want … to … party! This fact was not lost on McKnight, who put on his own mini-concert. He played his strength – and he didn’t try to appease his teammates in the process. The rest of the boys only needed to give him room. That voice, the energy – the crowd went mad! Nevermind that the product was vaguely used – and then only by women dancing and spinning on stage. McKnight gave them what they wanted and they voted in his favor.

In fact, the men won 85 percent of the vote. Poor Claudia. While she tried to blame Melissa for not giving her support, she was little girl lost, even while in the boardroom when she chose to also face-off with Khloe Kardasian, a move that gave both Khloe (and me) whiplash. (Seriously, where did THAT one come from?). Her fate was sealed. She got the boot…And Rodman’s still there. Go figure.

I admit: week three was really painful for me to watch. Basically because I had an idea of whom this week’s loser would be about five minutes into the show. And the fact that that person wasn’t Dennis Rodman was even more reason for me not to care. (I swear: on the off chance that Rodman wins this season – I will NEVER, EVER watch another Trump anything again in my life!)

So this week’s challenge was really a hands-down, no-brainer for the women: the teams were to sell as many bridal gowns as possible. Duh! To paraphrase Herschel Walker, ‘Women dream of this day; men only dream of not being there.’ Funny, however true it might be. The women’s team leader was Playboy’s Brande Roderick (I couldn’t make this stuff up), while comedian Tom Green led the men’s team (the polar opposite of grandeur, sophistication and good taste).

While the women brought in a fashion expert to spiffy up the décor (smart move), and worked in unison to bring home yet another win (the team’s THIRD of three challenges), Green, not surprisingly was lost in the shuffle. Though he tried to play to the cameras, in reality he had absolutely no clue. He didn’t think to decorate the boutique in high fashion (or any other fashion for that matter). He didn’t address Rodman to insist that he “appear” to care about the challenge, leaving Rodman instead to his usual routine: mumble incoherent statements. Drink. Flirt. Basically, leaving Rodman to…being Rodman.

In what can only be termed as the least surprise of any Apprentice, the women won. Correction: the women didn’t simply win – they crushed their unwitting opponents. They were David to the men’s Goliath. It’s going to be sad to break the women apart, an inevitability given the losing team’s numbers.

In the end Tom got the boot – which was hilarious given he really didn’t see how he failed his team (though he casually left the guys to hustle in vain to pull off a win, leaving for the hotel in the middle of their spastic workflow).

I felt like Clint Black, who responded to The Donald’s question of ‘Who would you fire?’ with: They should both be fired. (Referring to Green and Rodman.) Black’s got a good head on his shoulders. Too bad he’s on the losing team. But there’s hope on the horizon. Previews for next week’s show reveal a belligerent Rodman in the boardroom (surprise!).

Could it be the end of the mumbling, “dear-Lord!-what’s-he-even-saying?” former NBA-sideshow-bridal-gown-wearing-Madonna-lovin’-excuse of a celebrity? One can only hope. O’ one can only hope!

Watching the film adaptation of Watchmen without first reading the graphic novel feels like inhaling the aroma of a warm pie without having the satisfaction of being able to taste it; it’s deprivation.

With a compellingly complex storyline that narrates through the escapades of watchdog superheroes operating in an alternate 1980’s reality during the brink of a nuclear holocaust, Watchmen proves to be an adrenaline rush.

After having witnessed the theatrical testament to why Alan Moore’s graphic novel by the same name is acclaimed as one of the 100 Greatest Novels of All Time, I was inclined to purchase the novel to further explore this inherently magnetic story. Even though I have yet to read it and won’t be able to give a broadly-scoped comparative perspective, my feelings on the film itself should be able influence your decision on whether this is something that will please you or not.

The film begins with the death of Smoochy. The previous statement would only be true if Smoochy was The Comedian, which he isn’t. The film begins with the death of The Comedian, a former member of the Watchmen. The Watchmen, a dismembered band of superheroes, were forced to diverge and lead separate lives because of the impeding Keene Act of 1977, which outlawed superheroes.

The band consisted of Edward Morgan Blake/The Comedian, Walter Kovacs/Rorschach, Daniel Dreiberg/Nite Owl II, Adrian Veidt/Ozymandias, Laurie Juspeczyk/Silk Spectre II and Jonathan Osterman/Doctor Manhattan. The only two members who remain employed under the “hero” title upon their introduction are The Comedian and the omnipotent Doctor Manhattan, both of whom work for the government.

Or as in The Comedian’s case, worked for the government. The death of The Comedian spawns a state of unrest in many of the remaining former Watchmen, particularly Rorschach, a vigilante who continues to fight crime, but on “his own terms”.

The events succeeding the funeral of The Comedian illustrate how each former Watchman deals with their situation at a time when their previously held positions of power are rendered obsolete. The story of these events is strengthened with the interjection of flashbacks that delve deeper into the backstory of several of the superhero characters.

Doctor Manhattan, the only Watchman with actual superpowers, and the United State’s ultimatum against the Soviet Union during the ongoing Cold War, is forced to exile to Mars when he is accused of being the direct cause of cancer in his old friends and colleagues. Ensuing, pandemonium erupts between the two countries, Rorschach is framed for murder and imprisoned, Silk Spectre II & Night Owl II resume a crime-fighting campaign, and Ozymandias is nearly assassinated within the walls of his new enterprise.

Each one’s subplot intertwines with the next gracefully, and gradually reveals ulterior intentions and emotions that ultimately beguile the viewer from the macro-scaled phenomenon that is eventually witnessed.

To say more on the progression of the storyline would comprise the experience of watching the film.

Zack Snyder, the director of Watchmen (also the director of 300), has been acclaimed by fans for maintaining all the elements of the graphic novel. For myself, this acclamation remains to be seen. Regardless…watching Watchmen is an experience I highly recommended.

Day 13 Jalapao – Taj and Stephen get more water and take a side trip to the treemail to look for the Hidden Immunity Idol. The last Exile clue hinted it would be in that area and after searching for about a minute, she finds it and immediately hands it to Stephen because she has no pockets (a downside to wearing a dress for the first episode).  Stephen says, “But you know, as long as it’s in my possession I’m going to try to keep it in my possession.  … it is mine. I’m the one who’s wearing the idol around my neck.”

Day 13 Timbira – The tribe heads to the water except Sierra and Brendan who are left at the camp to discuss their secret alliance with Taj and Stephen from Jalapao.  Brendan tells Sierra he has the Hidden Immunity Idol.  Sierra is proud of herself and feels she’s aligned with the right person and no longer feels like a “looser.” I’m skeptical though that the alliance will make it all the way through the game.

Challenge 1 is a reward challenge.  Played in rounds, one tribe member is spun on a wheel pulled by another tribe mate. After being spun and flung that team member stands and walks across a balance beam for a point. If they fall they start over. The team with the most points after 4 rounds wins a café style lunch and a modern toilet break for the afternoon. However, with the twist on Exile this season that means one member of the winning tribe won’t enjoy the potty or yummy food.  Round one and two make the game tied. Round 3 is won by JT of Jalapao and the final round is won by Sydney for Jalapao. Jalapao chooses Brendan for Exile and he chooses Stephen to go with him seeming to favor Taj. Timbira mate Tyson says that he’s suspicious of Brendan’s relationships with the other tribe.

At the Charmin Café for the reward the Jalapao team enjoys coffee, pastries and…a surprise! Letters from home! Everyone cries including the guys.

At Timbira they decide Stephen is next to be voted out.  And despite ridiculous attempts at weather prediction, Coach says he felt the wind change and based on the way the clouds look he thinks a storm is coming but will pass Timbira camp. But it doesn’t and we get this great quote from Erinn, “Coach is kind of a jack ###. I think Coach really truly wants to be this like Survivor Man.” Coach is definitely something else, that’s for sure.

At Exile the boys bond.  Now everyone is on the same page –Taj and Stephen from Timbira and Brendan and Sierra from Jalapao are in a 4 way, cross tribe, secret alliance and each pair has their own Hidden Immunity Idol. Stephen confesses he doesn’t 100% trust Brendan and he’ll keep the 4 way alliance in the back of his mind but can’t put all faith into someone he doesn’t fully trust or know.

Day 15 Jalapao – Sydney and Spencer discuss relationships. Sydney asks if there are any girls back home for Spencer. Spencer tells the world (well just the TV audience and camera guy) that he’s gay.

Challenge 2 is an Immunity challenge. Two members of each tribe sling shot a ball into a coarse where the other tribe mates are waiting to catch it with handheld nets. It doesn’t matter what color ball the Survivors catch, each ball is 1 point and the first tribe to 5 points wins.  JT catches the first ball scoring for Jalapao. Next, JT scores again. Joe makes an honorable dive but misses and hurts his knee a little too.  Ball three is caught by Brendan. JT just misses. One point for Timbira.  Ball four is again caught by Brendan. JT gets ball 5 but his net handle catches his chin and breaks off a tooth. Jeff holds on to it for safe keeping (it’s just half a tooth).  JT also scores a 4th point for Jalapao.  Tyson scores the 3rd point for Timbira. JT is obviously frustrated with Spencer saying “Come on Spence let’s do this.” Tyson again scores for Timbira tying the game.  JT shouts at Spencer telling him to stop the other team from scoring, “that would be nice.” Tyson scores the winning point and Timbira wins immunity. JT is frustrated and says, “I don’t wanna send anyone home, but it’s gotta be Spencer.”

At Jalapao after the challenge some of the team gathers in the water to discuss who is to be voted out. Taj is mad and doesn’t care what others think of her mood. She confronts Joe on why he’s never come to her as an ally. Joe later says to Stephen and JT, “She’s next” and Stephen is torn. JT and Joe talk about voting Spencer out due to his performance in this last challenge. Spencer walks up to the water and over hears the end of JT’s conversation.

At tribal council Jeff brings up the feeling a Survivor gets when they know their head is on the chopping block. Spencer talks about coming back to camp after the challenge and how tense it was with JT. He’s very honest is an adult normal, non confrontational or blaming way that’s rarely seen in these moments on the show. I’m impressed with the open and well handled conversation. Next the conversation of the Hidden Immunity Idol comes up and Joe states he hasn’t heard Taj say that she DOESN’T have it and how that affects the team’s trust and how they deal with her.  With probing from both Jeff and Joe, Taj says “I do not have the idol.” She’s banking on the fact that literally, the Idol is not in her possession that Stephen still has it, but the other tribe mates don’t know this yet. 

I wonder if Jeff Propst knows about the secret alliance. Once the votes are cast and counted it’s Spencer who is the 5th person voted off Survivor Tocantins (pronounced ‘token’ ‘cheese’ as I like to say it).

Celebrity Apprentice Round Two: This week’s challenge was to spearhead a campaign for Zappos, a shoe line. Leading the women was Khloe Kardashian.

Gotta tell ya’: That Khloe is a businesswoman to the bone! Her mad skills and leadership techniques were perfect for this segment – even (dare I say? – a joy to watch (nothing like the spoiled rich girl we’ve seen on “Keeping Up…”

Then there was Scott Hamilton, who took the helm for the men. Though his leadership skills really needed to be tweaked, I have to admit I don’t know how I would’ve dealt with the disrespect (namely from Tom Green). Green’s technique apparently worked. Frustrated beyond belief, Hamilton allowed Green to get under his skin – a move that would cost him greatly.

Both teams presented their marketing ideas to the client: Green was chosen to present for the guys – and did a pretty good job in spite of being him. The women elected Deal or No Deal’s Claudia Jordan, who exhibited flu-like symptoms the night before the presentation. It didn’t go over too well.

Muttering and stammering in front of Trump and Zappos’ executive, the ONLY thing that saved the women this week was Hamilton’s major blunder: Not accepting the ONE decent idea Green offered during the brainstorming sessions: naming the campaign’s heroine with a “Z” (as in Zelda) as opposed to “EEE” (Hamilton’s big idea, which he insisted stood for: Everything, Everywhere, Every time…or something like that). Yeah, whatever.

The guys lost. Hamilton chose Green to faceoff with in the boardroom. Just Green. The Donald, clearly trying to give Hamilton an edge highly suggested he choose one other player to tip the scales a bit. Hamilton complied and chose…(Huh?)…Walker. Yes, Walker, the only guy who came to his defense in the brainstorming session, stepping up to Green in support of Hamilton. The choice was so obviously devoid of thought, Walker shook his head in sheer shock. The kind of shock one gets when hit broadside by an oncoming train. And I understood.

Hamilton, on the other hand, had no clue how to play the game. When asked why he chose Walker, Hamilton said, “For support.” His fate was sealed. Between the “EEE” fiasco and his choice of Walker, Trump announced, “Scott, you’re fired!” Which means Rodman’s still there. There is no justice.

On March 2, 2009, Donald Trump uttered those infamous words, “You’re fired!” to this season’s first casualty.

This year the women’s team (Athena) is made up of poker champion Annie Duke; golf champion Natalie Gulbis; Deal or No Deal’s Claudia Jordan; reality star Khloe Kardashian; comedienne Joan Rivers and daughter Melissa; Playboy’s Brande Roderick; and T-Boz of the R&B singing group TLC.

Rounding out the men’s team (Kotu) are: country star Clint Black; comedians Andrew Dice Clay and Tom Green; figure skater Scott Hamilton; TV star Jesse James; R&B singer Brian McKnight; NBA player Dennis Rodman; and Heisman Trophy winner Herschel Walker.

The first show of the season featured the celebrities in a cupcake contest. Giving no support whatever to his team, Dennis Rodman pretty much single-handedly turned the win over to the women – who may not have always seen eye-to-eye but were, at leased, focused on a goal.

Joan Rivers served as team leader and really showed her entrepreneurial savvy – much to my surprise. The men’s team was led by Herschel Walker, who is apparently much better on the field then in the boardroom. Nice guy, just not a motivator, a fact made abundantly clear by Rodman, who paid absolutely no attention to Walker’s direction (or lack of, depending on who you ask) – in fact, it would seem Rodman’s only purpose on the show is to sit behind the scenes while he reaches out to somebody much more important on his cell.

Not surprisingly the men lost. In the boardroom Walker faced off with Rodman and Clay – who was out of his element from “go.” For reasons only The Donald knows, Clay got the boot. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not losing sleep over it; I just don’t know why Rodman’s still there. Maybe he’ll be next. (One can only hope.)

“You loved him on “SNL.” You hated him in movies. Now you’re ambivalent. Please welcome… Jimmy Fallon!” That’s one of the potential openings announcer Steve Higgins considered, according to Entertainment Weekly. Ironic because that’s also how I feel since Fallon’s show started Monday night.

The “SNL” alum shows his former Weekend Update roots when he does his opening monologue. Rather than the loose, somewhat improvisational monologues of fellow late night comedy hosts Jay Leno, Conan O’Brien and David Letterman, Fallon moves at a rat-a-tat pace and overly emphasizes the set-ups and punch lines.

As he reads off cue cards too much or awkwardly handles guests, he lacks O’Brien’s lovable craziness, Leno’s confidence, and Letterman’s charming curmudgeoness. Rather than playing up an interview with an odd guest like Letterman did with Joaquin Phoenix last month, Fallon didn’t know quite what to do with his first guest Robert De Niro who was aloof and quiet.

His interviews fare better when they’re with his friends like Tina Fey. Yet, then the audience is stuck feeling alienated as we listen to a one-on-one private conversation between two friends talking about old times or parties they attend together.

One thing Fallon’s got down pat though is his appeal to the youth demographic. Not only is his audience primarily made up of 20-somethings, he draws them in by incorporating Facebook into his gags and doing a soon-to-be recurring Internet Video of the Day skit. He also makes for a really nice, personable guy running up into the audience every night clapping hands and bringing a girl onstage to sing karaoke alongside Jon Bon Jovi.

The skit, however, where he brought young audience members up to the stage to lick things for $10, like most of his other skits, fell flat. Where’s the humor in watching a kid lick a lawnmower? It wouldn’t be any funnier if Fallon gave me $10 to watch either.

Given Fallon’s nice guy attitude and his funny days on “SNL,” his show is worth keeping an eye on though. Plus, late night comedy shows do take time. Case in point is O’Brien who notoriously got pounded by the critics for the first year of his show and came dangerously close to getting canceled way back in 1995. But now look at him. Starting this June, he takes over from Leno as new host of the “Tonight Show.”

In the meantime, I loved him on “SNL,” hated him in movies (well “Fever Pitch was alright”), and right now I’m ambivalent about him.

Jason Mesnick, star of The Bachelor, continues to deny claims from rejected contested Melissa Rycroft that he cheated on her with runner-up Molly Malaney.

He says he was prepared to risk asking Malaney to be with him – in front of Rycroft – on national television.

Afterwards, Mesnick says he feels bad about dumping Rycroft, his fiancee, on television according to UsMagazine.com

“I regretted it every single day since that happened, and I will regret probably every day for the rest of my life,” he says.

Aside from his regret, Mesnick says he’s really happy right now and believes he’s found true love with Malaney.